January 8, 2012
Weekly Training Summary (57.11 miles / 10:04:20)
Born to bleed, fighting to succeed
Built to endure what this world throws at me
- Hatebreed, In Ashes They Shall Reap
Breakdown
Mon - Green Mountain
Tue - 10M
Wed - Green Mountain
Thu - Green Mountain
Fri - 10M
Sat - Off
Sun - 20M
Thoughts
Not at all what I expected out of that week. I had multiple opportunities to hit the hills this week so I took them all. Then, I got up late on Saturday and decided not to run. It was gloomy outside and I had stuff to do inside to prepare for my trip. Just break the 2012 streak right there so that I don't have to feel guilty months from now. Sunday was perfect weather and I went out for 10 but ended up just doing 20 and bonking. Good times.
I seem to have gotten away without posting my 2011 annual mileage total and my usual New Years Day goals for the year. Ssssh. The mileage was more than last year by a bit. The goals are sort of obvious if you have been playing along at home. So I am breaking protocol for now and not writing all that stuff down.
Somewhere in 2011 my motivation changed. I don't whether or not its for the better or worse yet. Just different. One thought that I have been struggling with is how WS100 is a one shot deal for me. With most races, you can live to fight another day. With this race combined with my situation (lottery, etc), I get one shot at this. Its feels very Eminem "Lose Yourself". So I need to focus on what the goal is and work to achieve that and only that. No stretch goals.
Over the last month, I watched a bunch more movies on Netflix while on the treadmill. Most were a bunch of documentaries. Like Touching the Void, Running the Sahara and Ride the Divide. The one theme that I focused on during all those movies was this theme of quitting and failure. Each of those stories captured a sense of despair, a sense of lack of purpose, a sense of loneliness, and a desire to quit. It was interesting to be removed from the situation and get to see the mental game play out day after day in each of these cases. And how in each case, the true winners just overcame that reality distortion field and concentrated on the end goal.
I feel like I have been training my mental game throughout this off-season. I had my own failure to deal with. I watched my first 100 and paced a little bit. And I have been studying these themes in those films. I want to understand this and burn it into my mind. Because those thoughts will be pervasive once again this year but I feel like I have a new set of tricks to help me deal with that aspect like never before.
Now I just need to focus on my hike a bit more, then my nutrition. Then just run long a lot.
I have a house booked for Squaw in June for a week. It sleeps a lot of people. And I filled it up with family, friends, crew, pacers, and supporters. Its going to be a big show. I will be the star. I am not going to fuck up my one shot, my one opportunity.
Feet fail me not, this may be the only opportunity that I got
